wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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