I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
