Non-Jews are for practice
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
