Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
