you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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