yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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