it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
