Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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