there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize