i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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