dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
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