her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
