Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
