I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
