I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
