Just took my morning after pill in the library
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
