Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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