D3 body, D1 cock
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
