Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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