so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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