I love black thongs
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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