Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
