I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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