Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize