It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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