I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
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So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I want a musical about memes.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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