I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
