Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
