I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
id be glad to
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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