so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
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I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
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I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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