no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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