It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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