Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
