It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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