I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
