Can Purell be used as lube?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
