capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
