they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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