watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
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West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
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me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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