Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize