Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
