I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
