It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
