tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
