So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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