i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
