So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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