I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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