i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
