Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
