she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
